Hahaha, sighhhh...I texted him to no response. It's a shame, really...I would gladly exchange my body for pizza rills.
Not only do prius' look terrible they are terrible to have sex in
im in an endless cycle of being too hung over to eat all day...then getting too drunk because i didnt eat anything. where is my life going?
I just went to a subway where the girl didn't know how to make a blt. I will not miss public school texans.
Trying not to fart in the comp lab is going to take everything i've got.
i'll never see her again. i cant remember her last name. this is like cinderella except prince charming drank too much jameson and couldnt save a phone number properly
Real housewives of new joisy starts MONDAY. Skype session after? Virtual slap the bag?
So i learned you can't hair-of-a-dog jaeger hangovers.
okay when i look at this i can see it on the future news along with the headline "picture scandal involving senatorial candidate sexually harassing drunken idiot in what appears to be a pink room of pain"
But I did spend part of my morning scrubbing your cum off my grandmothers piano.
She kept giving the uber driving directions and we all thought they were wrong so we'd send him the other way. Turns out she wasn't guiding us home, but to the half gallon that she hid in the bushes on the way to the bar.
he accidentally put it in my ass, i liked it but didn't tell him that and "accidentally" took his weed.
Made it to my hair appointment on time, and got some dick. Today is already a great day
Honestly no idea how dad figured out i did all that gay porn unless he was looking at gay porn.
When he pulled out it sounded like a balloon deflating
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