Yeah I gave the girl a dirty look. And only a three dollar tip.
Regardless, you never quit out of your interenet. You left your porn on the living room comp. Then you passed out four feet from the chair with your hand still down your pants. We decided that we should go back to her place instead. Worlds best wingman.
i woke up with someone drivers licenses in my wallet this am...he said i don't have a business card so just take my drivers license
her last google searches are 'cheap african safari' and 'what does lion taste like'
Also I may have a condom stuck inside me, but I won`t know til I check the couch coushions.
Never again. I promise. My old gay body can't handle that much adrenaline twice.
You burned the hair off your arms. Again.
It grows back stronger each time.
legit question. can i put a condom down our garbage disposal? my rents are coming over in 20
Just came to the realization that what I thought were orgasms were just lightheadedness from hyperventilation. My entire sex life is a lie.
I think I blacked out after I decided drinking alone on the trailered jetskis was a good idea
He left for work so I drank pickle juice from his fridge
this makes me concerned. not enough to actually do anything about it, but yeah.
We took three cabs to get home, the first one dropped us off a block away, so we went back to the hotel and tried again
Dont be alarmed when you come homeand see a guy handcuffed to your bed. His name is james. Ill uncuff him when I get home
Does it still count as a threesome if one girl left halfway through cause we were having too much sex?
Fuck you for even being able to ask that question
Randomize
