paul mccartney is starting to look like angela lansbury
when she was cumming she looked like terri schiavo. it took all of my memorized porn images to not go limp.
Her father's a cardiologist, her mom's a lawyer...she just went from a 5 to a 10 real quick.
Forever 21 now has a maternity line. Even more of an incentive for me to get pregnant at a young age.
It would be been irresponsible not to make cleaning the apartment into a drinking game
Upperdeckered the toilet. Took sombrero off, drawing too much heat. Witnessed glassing. In bush, come findme.
How the fuck did you end up in a tree? With multiple people?
Jake bring pizza.
JAKE BRING PIZZA.
We just broke into a lion king sing along. Understanding is not possible.
You know you're fucked up when you decide to pour fireball whiskey in your vegetable beef soup
WE'RE NOT MAKING A DICK PIZZA OKAY
I just need a big sign that says no more penis please hanging over my head at all times
My niece I'm babysitting left earlier to stay the night with her friend. I got ditched by an 8 year old.
dude the last time we saw him was 2 nights ago when he was yelling that the trees were naked or some shit then he ran into the forest. I think its time for a search party
Sean just lit a cig with his taser..... I am in awe
Randomize