i cvme to yuor rooom...wherer are youf?
please be gone before i get back
Her body is shaped like a coke bottle...a two liter coke bottle
I left a bag of circus animal cookies in my car all day. they melted together into on giant cookie. this could either be the best or worst thing ever
My mom is wearing Ed Hardy. There aren't words.
Lesbians. Lesbians everywhere.
I just got kidnapped by the rugby team for a scavenger hunt. I'm "the girl you had sex with last night"
You should have seen her, she looked like a skinny Jabba The Hutt
That literally makes no sense
Exactly
So i know i shouldnt being spending random large amnts of money...but i just bought a sword.
Slip and slide hallway was not one of my better ideas.
We tried to hook you up with a girl but you said you'd rather fuck the large muscular black man because "At least he'd be tight". He was the bouncer, he heard you.
I was just doing the math on how much beer we need for the houseboat. in doing so, I came to the conclusion that we need to open a beer distributor business.
Apparently "I have the beer shits" isn't the excuse my boss wanted to hear. So sue me
Come here I'm naked
And I want mozzarella sticks
We had sex and then stood naked in his living room eating zucchini bread.
8 minutes into the New Year and and I've already sent a nude...new year, new me?
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