Do you think there's anyone left in this world that hasn't masturbated in a computer chair?
Michelle and I recorded her bunny humping it's little rubber black ball.
don't worry, i have a range rover and a brother hopped up on steroids.. we can solve this little misunderstanding quite easily.
Just ate cheeseit crumbs off the floor. i feel like Kirstie Alley.
i can't find my house
we droppd you off right in front! i even walked you to the steps less then 3 mins ago.
i'm pretty sure my house moved.
We're smoking a joint the size of the average penis right now. I may not survive.
Did we fight the bathroom girl ? She just wanted to give us lotion and condoms.
So, just in case you go to the bathroom in the middle of the night.. Sam is asleep in the first stall.
I spent a lot of time in their kitchen cause I was convinced that the living room was gonna fall... Sorry for not warning you about that.
It is not if she takes a guy home Karaoke night. It is how many.
I felt like I was having sex with Joffrey from Game of Thrones. Needless to say how bad it was
Have you ever been so high that you felt like corduroy? I'm at that level.
The boob job was worth every penny just to see the expression of pure joy on his face the first time he saw them.
Wtf can everyone stop fucking in my grandma's bed? This is like the third time
This is why I should’ve just stuck with blow jobs. I’m good at blow jobs. Blow jobs never fail me.
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