What a fucking waste of an outfit
I am officially superior to you. I said "Go Go Gadget Dick" before I fucked her. I dare you to beat that.
he is so annoying
so stop sleeping with him
yeah but he is so hot when i'm drunk
Can the rest of this semester just go by as a montage?
Dude I pulled down his pants and he already had a condom on
He was the drug dealer that jumped out of his car to get my number
I feel a bullet train of disappointment headed in your direction.
The fact that she put a frat guy in check tells me I did some good raising my little sister. Time to see if she does keg stands.
That's the best thing about having gay dads, you don't gotta do shit on mothers da and everybody is down wit getting wasted on mimosas at brunch
I'm pretty sure at any given moment you could wring out my liver and get a couple of shots of jäger.
Ive never seen one person more proud of themselves of peeing in public and getting away with it.
His brother just asked him in all seriousness if it would be cool if they became eskimo brother brothers.
It also means I'm watching porn with mario earphones so i can hear. Possibly the best way to mastrabate EVER
Somehow, you looked so classy chugging that bottle of wine last night.
good morning. i just did a walk of shame in front of his grandmother.
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