im getting my college education on yahoo answers.
there is a large number of people floating in the fountains the morning in inter-tubes...its only 930. did i miss something?
She tags her boyfriend in all of her pictures on her heart...
I suppose drinking a cosmo at lunch alone can't look good but I mean... sometimes it's just necessary
Brought 2 entire pizzas with to the bar, everyone loves us
After last night, I've decided I will now bang only men who professionally ride things for a living. I will accept jockeys, cowboys, bullriders, and pro bicyclists who lie and say they're bullriders.
The bar has bullet holes in the ceiling, and the country singer had been playing drunken weezer covers. A man just bought me a beer on the grounds that I 'have his back' in a fist fight with a stranger texan. And, yes, the bartender is wearing a sherif's badge
Sorry my hands just texted you
Well, no one has ever described you as a perfectly balanced individual
While I'm on hiatus from the Russian potato nectar, it is my wish for others to enjoy it in my stead.
I think I need to see a chiropractor after giving that blow job
Last night I was introduced as the Picasso of getting fucked up so I obviously had to live up to it by chugging long islands
I've never seen so much of my blood outside me. After the initial shock it was kind of cool.
Ok next time we are filming it. You bring the camera and I'll buy more socks
Question: the touchscreen on my phone randomly quit working, do you think this could be a latent reaction from me peeing on my phone last weekend?
Randomize
