margs and chips and queso make the world go round
well and inertia
Instead of having sex, we spent the entire night making pillow forts and have sword fights. I think I'm in love
just heard a swedish guy suck in helium and speak in his accent. top 5 favorite moments. ever.
I hope no one judges me for becoming a facebook fan of "Adderall" at 5:49 AM...
I didn't think I could chip a tooth while giving a blowjob until I met him.
My bosses just told me they met their wives on one night stands. I'm stoked.
Aaaaand then she sang MDMA to the tune of the YMCA song, with appropriate gestures.
my longitudinal study of the long term effects of sloth and alchol-intake is nearly complete.
so you are graduating this semester.
there is nothing worst than getting kicked in the face by a stripper
He just had a handle of vodka with ice in it yelling at people hot august night mother fuckaaaaa and was pouring it on his face
The profile of her ass is just unreal. Weird way to use profile I know, but never more accurate
Why did I see a weird snapchat of you barking at McDonald's last night?
My friends got engaged today and I learned the techniques of going upside down on a stripper pole. I'm not really sure who won...
fuck school, let's just become the worst strippers ever
Why the fuck is Ian Naked eating string cheese in my guest bedroom?
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