i'm at the gym and so are four guys who have seen my tits. i need winter break.
Sarah Palin just got hired for Fox News. Watch out Jersey Shore... there's a new drinking game in town
He had a huge mole on his dick. Genetics has cockblocked him for life.
Either I'm a lot drunker than I thought, or he has three dicks....
I think I'm gonna have to go with the first one...
And it looks like I sent you 4 failed attempts at the word "hey." Sorry about that.
He offered me a ride home but i walked. He lives by an elementary school so a 10 yr old safety officer helped me across the street during my walk of shame
WHAT? When did I ever refer to one of my past hookups as "the rainforest guy"?
This is the only time in your life where finding a half eaten lime and pair of florescent pink underwear that wasn't yours means that it was a good night
We call it "Dishes: Hard Mode". Basically whoever is doing dishes gets head but needs to finish the dishes before they cum.
And so far nothing been broken!
Some guy just drank alcohol from me shoe..I think he's had enough..
Its official, if she bites your dick through your jeans, ya'll go together. A lesson you shouldn't have to learn after the fact.
Ok, they now been on the roof for two days. I can see 4 cases of teecate and a carton of smokes. They are yelling at "fucking fall" and pissing off the roof.
i've now hooked up with two guys who have tattoos of their sister's names...so that's a reality i have to live with...
At least you got some excitement going on, you got weed and might die tonight, I'm just sitting here bored as fuck.
if i hadn't ended our catfight by hugging you one of us might be dead right now
Randomize
