How many pudding cups do I have to eat for it to count as dinner?
4.
If I have to go to the hospital can we stop by the liquor store on the way?
I have been drinking since 2. And I'm now chasing the cat around the house with a light saber. Anna's helping.
nothing worse than walking out of class after 3 hours and having covered exactly zero information
walking out with herpes. that would be worse
FUCK YOU. AH. FUCK BOTH OF US MORE BOOZE.
MAS TEQUILA.
Phone sex soon? I mean date. Sex date. Date phone.
all 3? possibly?
I think I'm up to the challenge.
Baked and hanging out with Al from Home Improvement's son. You can't make this shit up. Tuh-rippin balls
During your work shift I was either: a) stoned. b) high. c)stoned. or d) high.
I just rode a horse than walked onto my property in boarshorts, flip flops, and holding a 40. What do I win?
Would 7 layered rainbow jello shots entice you?
I've got your keys and your panties. You can have one back. Your play honeybuns.
I can see the future and your future is full of penis
Is this what it's like to be an adult? You plan out play dates for your vagina?
I'm seriously considering selling my books back early. I don't use them anyways and I could really use the beer money..
Are you telling me right now that the weed man sexted you?
THE WEED MAN SEXTED ME!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
Randomize