no, he's only a walking dick if he mans up. right about now he's just a walking transgender.
so i used to love airports for the escalators... now its the bars... then the escalators after the bars
he was wearing a tuxedo, i was naked...it's a long story.
I know I'm her Sunday school teacher. I just feel I would be saving others from a lot of headaches by telling her someday she's going to be a stripper
there's another hole in my ceiling...someone fell through the attic this time....
I can't. I will literally throw up my liver
Why dont you be an ebola patient for halloween? You can totally throw up and itll be part of your costume.
There was a sweat stain in the shape of a fast chick with low standard on your bathroom floor
Wanna hang out? my DILF had to dip out for his sons little league game
I don't know what's worse the the fact he has worn a protective cup for last 3 years in fear of being kicked in the balls. Or the fact that the one day he decides to throw caution to the wind and doesn't wear it and actually gets kicked in the balls.
Who in tha hell do u hang out with?
NoShamevember. You game?
It's going to be weird as hell when you have kids. I'll meet them and think "Hi, Did you know that I was almost your dad?"
First time at a gay bar. I found a surrogate AND sperm donor! The surrogate is straight, so it evens out.
I was on all fours trying to empty the bowl we smoked into the sewer when your neighbor came out, but besides that it went smoothly
Just for once I'd like my first interaction with a new GP to not be an obvious sex injury.
When Dad gets to your house, ask him about the sound of anal beads. Happy Thanksgiving!
Randomize
