Baton twirling is one of his activities on facebook.
Also he is "an Ohio stae gran champion twirler". You cannot tell me he's straight
Apparently I masturbate in my sleep now.
Some girl in the stall next to me just yelled "fuck yes i started my period!" she came out of the stall and we high fived. who am i to judge? i do that every month.
I was on my way at Dorito Smoothie
There's a hand-carved wooden bong in my backpack, and i really wish i could remember last night now.
There is a mirror in the headboard of the bed that I'm sleeping in so I can immediately question life choices when I wake up.
I have now added draft and wells specials that different bars have to my blackberry calendar.. Help me.
He knew exactly who I'd slept with after just one look at my crotch. He's like the Sherlock Holmes of cocks.
Fell down the metal stairs and some guy tried to fight me after you left. I fell asleep with cadbury eggs in my mouth too.
He had bigger boobs than me last night and we both weren't wearing a bra so it was a fair judgement
I think the 8 yr old is hitting on me and they just prayed for the salvation of third world countries
Have you ever just sat there and thought about past penises?
Yeah but you let me touch your butt. You're clearly the winner.
Just googled myself and a bunch of boob shots of me came up. Apparently my phone automatically uploaded them to my google plus.
Please google me ASAP and ensure I corrected this...
I never thought I'd be complaining about having sex 4 times a day, but here we are...
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