Viking lives by an ancient code of honor that we do not understand.
What code could that possibly be? Bothering the fucking shit out of people while being physically repulsive?
i don't think you understand, blowjobs are like flowers for guys.
we got our roommate high for the first time. He went into his room alone and watched Malcolm in the middle for three hours
I dinstinctly remember making out to "I believe I can fly" and waving my arms like a bird to the beat.
Until last night, I had never actually thrown up ON a sandwich
I would not be 19 again if you paid me. Guess who found naked pictures of themselves? Fuck cocaine
One time she made a chronological chart for the guys she has given blow jobs to, I shit you not.
And there was a legally blind kid in a ref costume doing surprisingly well at beer pong who was passing out business cards
just had to get on my knees to snort an addy off the little sink at the daycare. teacher of the year!
I'm sorry about all of the innappropriate shoe throwing
Bring me a cialis. .. I feel like having a super dick today
my confident boosted when he told me that it was I who started making out with him. ME. NOT HIM.
I AM SHOCKED AND PROUD OF MYSELF
so all I remember is hig-fiving the cop and then sprinting away. considering I'm not in jail, I count that as a win.
I ACCIDENTALLY MURDERED MY COUSIN
HOW DO YOU ACCIDENTALLY MURDER YOUR COUSIN
He told his wife he was too old to pretend to be straight. She tried to argue. He walked two tables over and was like this is my highschool sweetheart and he's an excellent fuck, we're running away together. It was epic.
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