is her vagina suppost to smell like dirty taco bell?
The make-up sex just reminded me why we broke up in the first place.
True story: Just left my solo cup on a cop car. Yesss
Classic dick move. Breaking up your buddies 3-some by coming into his room and doing the Harlem Shake.
When do you sleep by the way. I was surprised when I went to work at 1 am,left at 7 am and had a text from you somewhere in between
I just vodka nap now...
Props to you. You took the bet seriously. Making out with her for an hour right after she spewed
Just cried because I'm out of oreos. This post-molly depression can go fuck itself.
in other news i got caramel vodka poured on me. upside, i smell amazing
His fucking flight got canceled because the president stopped at the airport he was flying out of... Fuckin Obama literally just cock blocked me
We're too hungover to prance.
And don't worry, I have a great track record of rallying after a casual midday blackout.
i woke up on the floor in front of the fireplace and my last google search was "fuck sponges"
This chick just walked out of the men's room with molly all over her nose and her shirt half unbuttoned. She nodded to all of us and said "gentlemen" as she exited
Yeah. 11 people shoved in a clown car for a 1 hour party. I'm too old for house parties.
Then you got drunk and shit in her car. Nothing before that matters. She isn’t calling you back.
Randomize
