Dude, she DOES look like she'd give good head. No bottom jaw, I checked.
why do my parents always seem to be having way more sex than i do?
then she made me sanitize my hands before fingering her...i may have found my soulmate
got them to do a wheelbarrow of shame down the sidewalk after the threesome. I rule
she refused to get out of the dog cage till we sang "be our guest" to her.
this ms. usa coverage has sucessfully humbled every girl here. depressed fish in a leaky barrel. go!
Everyone looked at me like I just fucked a gopher and was wearing it like a hat
I'm stoned and just shared 4 cookies with this chicks dog
They're raisins though so they're healthy. No worries.
But he's not just anonymous male genitalia anymore. I've met him, I've seen his face.
Someone touched my vagina when we were out last night. The fact that it was you is inconsequential and I am still counting it as a pull.
when i got home she was standing in my front yard not wearing a shirt and halfway crying/ halfway laughing
He asked if I was going to squirt out my bday candles. I'm glad the perversion doesn't stop for special occasions.
drunk and crying about Shakespeare- how's your night?
im bringing home some absinth and some holy water. one way or another things are going to get spiritual.
Will exercising make me less horny?
Randomize
