Oh and I watched laurens last episode on the hills. its been an emotional day
thanks 4 putting "im not your boyfriend baby" on my sex playlist. she just got pissed and left.
Leave it to him to get us kicked out of a bar for hitting on an 80 year old woman. I want to be that wasted one day.
This is worse that I thought. He's playing violin for me.
Just mixed my liver cleanse with Bacardi. Best. Thing. Ever.
Not rlly sure. Might just drink and sleep. Gotta wake up for my last rabies shot lol
My stomach is revolting cause i have put food in it and no alcohol.
Do what your heart wants. . .
My heart wants to rip his balls off and tie therm to his head using his penis
No, it wasn't really a sexy 'I'm going to go masturbate.' It was an 'I'm going to go masturbate' that implied I was going to drink a tall boy of Mikes and cry while I looked at lesbian porn.
we dropped acid in chinatown. worst. idea. ever. too many colors. and nobody has any idea where steve is.
I think the highlight of my night is when I was eating a mayonnaise sandwich. drunk me was on point.
Whatever you have to do, STALL THEM. Your toothbrush is in the kitchen, my pants are on the balcony, and I don't have eyebrows.
I was on antibiotics for a bladder infection and couldn't drink and you told me there was no longer room in your life for me.
Woke up, bank account is empty. Sock is still full of blood. Nothing in my pockets but a wireless mic and jenga pieces.
Did u guys seriously make a betting pool on when im going to get pregnant???
Yep, wanna bid?
Randomize
