im ready to get crazy and take my wig off
I think I'm going to go home and read The Bible.
I'm going to take the bottles back.. And maybe get an x-ray
They just gave us root beer floats. I guess I won't quit my job today.
One of my friends found 6 bags of gummy bears on the roof. He lives a building over. Apparently even hammered you still have quite an arm
he made me scream out "#24" while we fucked...no more football players
Katelyn drunkenly ripped the soap dispenser off the wall so we decided to call it quits
But mostly fuck him senseless. Render him speechless. Have him look at my vagina and wonder, "WHAT SORCERY IS THIS?!"
I really like her...she always overpays me for xanax and still feels the need to fuck me to make up for it....
The rest of the concert I just stared at the lights and didn't really listen to the music cuz I was trying to make sure my brain still worked cuz my face was numb and I couldn't move... Yeah I'm not a weed brownie person
Ur wingman ability is causing serious doubt
Ok first off its WAY easier if you are actually here
I went with plan f. get drunk and start a fire in my yard
I'm so hungover I just peed on my hand and left it, didn't wash... Killin it in 2915
One singular head for man, one giant climax for mankind
We already gave up cheese, how are we supposed to give up coke?
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