I feel like dying is the new "adopt an african baby"
Just set all my clocks a minute apart. Now my 4:20 is longer by sixfold
I think I'm cybering, it's been a while and its more in depth than it was in 8Th grade.
Is snow just God skeeting all over the place??
Yes. Yes it is.
Check Facebook. Random dude tagged us in photos from last night dancing at Denny's while eating a sampler platter. 1. How does he have our names, and 2. You said we ate at Tbell.
I can't believe they didnt cut us off after we all hugged each other and started singing "were the 3 best friends that anybody could have" RIGHT IN FRONT of the bar and bartender...
If after tonight I can still walk on my own, take me to another bar.
Kegstand on crutches, you need to get on my level.
I hope my tampon is in his bed. That'll teach him. Happy new years btw
Sunshine is the equivalent of sprinkling whore pellets on campus.
He said he doesnt believe in the female orgasm,so no I did not have sex with him.
Never let a one night stand shower at your place. My razor, lotion, and brush disappeared. #girlcode
She wouldnt stop trying to stick her finger in my ass. I wish she wasnt so hot
Now, one of you come feed me, the other read me my physics book...I'm too hungover for this shit...
Drunk me really does appreciate that sober me made a list of movies to watch when drunk it saves so much time
Randomize