this girl literally referred to her butthole as her "back pussy"
it was like brushing your tongue but with a fucking long toothbrush.
It was a rude awakening when I turned on my phone and the first thing I saw was a picture of David's dick with a face on it, I need to stop drinking in his basement...
at the hospital. he locked himself in the kitchen, said he was making beer batter shrimp. don't know if it's the mercury poisoning, alcohol poisoning or second degree burns they're holding him for, but i've got a pretty guess.
She fell out the car soaking wet and screaming "im wearing a fedora!" then tryed to seduce him on the front lawn in front of his middle aged neighbor
He's asking if he can send a dick pic. How do I politely decline that?
I got shot at last night. Lesson about married chicks: learned.
i love when the champions come out to play im bringin the shock collar this weekend
He is full of southern hospitality and I want to be full of him.
Sorry about coming to the pool in only a thong. I thought you said it was closed. Not that you were teaching a group of kids how to swim.
I woke up in Brittany's thong, Tony's shirt, and an oven mitt
answer my text you professional douchebag
and i mean that in the cutest, flirtiest way possible
It was so small.
Tiny. Got to love sexting. Imagine finding out the old fashioned way.
Life lesson 8263 if drinking a beer in the shower be careful when shampooing... Tresemme flavored rolling rock sucks
Okay but look at his jawline. I NEED TO RIDE IT.
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