where are my pants?
you were passing out with two blankets and the person next to you was cold so you gave him your pants to keep warm
thanks so much for stopping me from telling him i want to have sex with him while i proceeded to hookup with the air.
Maybe it's cuz you slapped him with a pancake last night
Did you sleep with Connor? And who undressed me? There's a picture of two guys peeing out my bedroom window. What happened?
I just tripped out to the Angel of Music from Phantom of the Opera in my car. Wayyyy to high for shuffle right now.
our flight took off 8 am and the bar didn't close til 5, so we decided it was a good idea to just stay out all night. Drunk logic is awesome. We were all scared we wouldn't get let onto the plane
I'm eating my emotions. I am no longer interested in anybody other than my own hand and vagina.
By getting lucky do you mean I get one of your incredible BJs or you not killing me by the end of dinner?
It feels like New Years Day all over again...me trying desperately not to throw up in the backseat & mom and dad blissfully unaware in the front
State dependent memory. I just needed to feel my teeth. It was like a fog was lifted.
On a completely different note: my hookup and i are now in a semester GPA competition. Winner gets froyo and sexual favors. School just got interesting.....
my hair smells like a mixture of fireworks and rotten eggs with a hint of shame. it's so strong it's keeping me awake.
I just don't understand why we can't have sex in the house. I'll come see you but I'll have to think about the barn thing.
I don't know who's idea it was to get wine for a frat party but my poor pitiful hung over self really fucking hates them.
I’ve had a lot of vodka, 3 different dicks and no food since last night. Come get me
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