I do no wrong. I am always right. Right? I forget why I am sending this. It seemed relevant.
would it be subtle enough if I played birthday sex on repeat while I may or may not be stripping?
I just introduced him to multiple male orgasms. I love wine AND tequila
He refused my I'm sry gift of ANAL. That's how angry he was.
Don't let the fact that shes seen my penis discourage you
Idk. Each time I ask him about double teaming a woman with Dennis Rodman he just giggles. We will never know what to believe.
I remember now some guy came over and hit on me and poured peppermint schnapps and chocolate syrup in my mouth. Pretty sure he was dressed like Santa....
All I could think when I saw it was, "All right, Vagina, only one of us is getting out of this alive."
He literally cocked blocked all the dudes that tried to talk to the girls he was with, and they all loved him.
Same guy who tossed the brunet over his shoulder as they left screaming "Bring me my lucky shovel!"
Just think of your bundle of joy thats on its way. And how hes gunna rip your vagina apart
Die.
Why are there jello shots in the kitchen drawer?
My roommate fed me my birth control pill while I was hungover laying on the couch so that's how my morning has been
What do you expect from her? Do you remember that creepy man she dated who saturated a pillowcase in his musky cologne and mailed it to her and she still slept with him.
If you dont get laid dressed as Woody Harrelson in Zombieland, I have lost all faith in the men of nw Indiana.
I mean she's doing calculus in her head to prove how NOT drunk she is.
Randomize
