i bet even starving children in Africa take the crust off their poptarts
Dude, I just saw a sixteen year old girl in a catholic school uniform buying a pregnancy test... With a coupon!
she told me she sucks everyone's dick but mine because mine is too big and "hard to suck" i need to reevaluate the girls i fall in love with.
I've never heard a "this is the reason why i dont suck your cock" explanation go in that direction
so...he totally just used scissors to cut up the weed. a wet paper towel to moisten the blunt....and a blow dryer so it wouldn't be wet. this dude either has the worst case of OCD or has the potential to be the next martha stewart.
For some reason I just don't think you going to the gay bar alone on thanksgiving is a good idea.
Going home with an argentinian named sulvio. Ill let you know how it goes.
Ummm. I just wanna say this now: Don't let me invite the band back to the apartment to see my stripper pole.
It was weird. Like "Mom, Dad, here's a guy who knows my orgasm face".
Broeke and glass. I feel so and. Appilogixe in morbing.
I'm pmsing and only have one functional foot
i want george washington to fuck me as hard as he can holy shit
I realize my mistake but don't you dare school me in cock, young man
He had been licking my nipple for like 5 minutes and it wouldn't get hard. He asked me to lick my own and when I did, instant hardness. I realized I'd rather have sex with myself then this guy ..
The cure for a hangover evidently is not walking around in a costume in the sun towards of park of screaming children
I want to shoot him sideways (so he can still breathe) in the Adam's apple with my little crossbow.
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