try this...when you orgasm scream his address including city state and zip...
The stories of what you did in Cuba got home before you.
Great parenting moment: noticing your kid is going to puke from gorging fish sticks and sending her outside. Then watching her puke on your dog.
NExt question... Do i wanna sleep under my palm tree
YES.
with your vagina and my liver, anything is possible
The pregnant Hooters waitress told me to "make good choices".
its sad that I know 23 beers will fit into my purse
his blanket is still in the back seat of my car, its like a constant reminder of his small penis
I just broke a sweat shaving my own vagina. Something has got to change.
Feeling better?
I can stand long enough to do the dishes finally. Been trying that all day.
I guess the study abroad went badly, I gave him a joint and he just smoked it and cried all the way from the airport
want to know what my life has come to? I just took a 45 min shower banging on the walls and making loud sex noises so my neighbors think I get some.
Out of curiosity, do you feel happiness for you, or sadness for ME, that you are the only one I drunk text?
No offense, but I don’t think I would want to see him in anything skimpier than a hazmat suit.
Speaking of dumpster fires, your ex tried to add me on Facebook
Randomize
