Pretty sure I only gave out my other # though. You know, 777 777-7777
Hahaha. So was it a Freudian slip, or wishful thinking? ;)
Could be either seeing as you're in my phone as "3rd bar" and I couldn't pick you outta a line up.
Last night was so much fun. i kept trying to lick everyone
The guy in front of me in Sociology is definitely working on my farm in farmville. Never met him before. Do I thank him?
If you're still on campus there's a jack and coke in the bathroom of fondren science Bldg. Too strong to bring to class.
Circumcision scars are like fingerprints. I think I'm on to something man.
the parade is in 5 days. put your big boy pants on and come to beer training. time to build your tolerance. i can't have you passing out in a bush with a cape on again this year.
Well obviously when I get drunk my intelligence level surpasses yours and that's why you can't understand me.
The dog just sneezed and it sounded like a person, after I said bless you I freaked the fuck out and got the gun
my dry spell has ended & now it's like a tsunami of dick i can't handle it
Weirdest drunk sex ever. His sweat dripped into my eyeball and then he looked down and asked me why I was crying. I went with it.
Guy in my class today said, "I'm pretty sure you think about beer 95% of the time."
Whose panties are you wearing on your head and why are you sending me pics of it?
If my one night stand asked me to move in with him right after does it still count as a one nighter?
just realized I'll be in a check out line with just Hershey syrup and condoms. I don't know if I am setting a good image for our generation
my near death experience doubled as my sexual awakening
Randomize
