you know what i hate about salt? you can't see it.
Im sick of reading dumb tattoos while having sex
kinda considering buying a life alert for sophmore year
And we should impose a 'friends don't let friends order 25 shots at last call' rule
you dipped you banana in queso last night.
It's sad that your definition of adulthood entails banging your boss after getting hammered at happy hour, and putting the tab on the company credit card.
Walmart at night is scary enough without having to run into people you've slept with
I just traded 5 cigarettes for a sandwich on they greyhound.You owe me 5 cigarettes. I told you I would get hungry.
It was like a square peg in a round hole... I've never seen one shaped like a stick of butter...
The front camera on the 5S is SO much better. This is great development for my international sexting.
sitting in the kitchen naked and eating stirfry, random dude left my room saying thanks and gave me a bottle of wine. explain...
after what u told me last night I think we're past the wtf zone and at this point u should just join me in wondering if my barista lover is a gay porn star
Do not buy a prego test at the Walgreens you frequent. It's awkward. Just trust me.
this is the second night in a row i've fucked a guy i met on craigslist. and it wasn't even a post for sex. i posted a housing ad. A HOUSING AD
the sex is SO much better when he thinks im going insane
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