Wow my backseat really seemed a lot bigger when we were 16
im sorry but my first introduction to your dick isn't going to be a pic sent from the men's room
my step dad just called me a drunken slut..someone in my family finally understands me
Well we didn't hook up. Maybe from his girlfriend's point of view, but not mine.
She just sucked the buffalo sauce out of my beard. I've never been so disgusted and hard in my life.
he walkred up to the manager at dennys and said 'look, my friends passed out in your bathroom, can i go get her?'
Softest bathroom rug I've slept on in my life, there have been many
Man my junk looks like a mangled grapefruit right now, this shit sucks.
Nhl reached an agreement. I plan on getting me some celebratory sex from a hockey player.
so you ordered business cards online last night with a picture of your dick on them. you need to hide that new credit card when you drink
I should come with a warning like "do not feed me tequila or cocaine, I will ruin the party and cry"
It's a special kind of bond when your gay brother takes pics of you topless at a frat party.
He referred to our sex as "an Olympic event." My tits are bruised.
No one knows how to work that "I pulled a muscle in my leg" drunk swagger like you can
I should've known a straight guy wouldn't know all the words to Moana
Randomize
