how was the sex?
he smelled like pickles and burnt hair.
well, there's that.
Ive either hit rock bottom or become my own hero.
i realized i had a pad on before i went to this guys house so i stuck it in his neighbors shrub.
Alright this has to stop. Without adderall I don't even have the motivation to get laid. College has ruined me.
It honestly wasnt my fault this time. i was in shock. WHO THE FUCK OWNS A PEACOCK?!
Shots and making dong molds for my gf's friends. Typical Monday night activities.
Next person that gets my dog drunk is paying to have my carpet cleaned. I am tired of getting up to pee and stepping in dog barf.
Yes, he made a MIX CD for our booty call...
I refused to call him anything but Drake eyebrows all night.
You've got to be fucking kidding me. Do you think "Husband drunkenly pees all over floors" is reasonable grounds for divorce? So pissed off right now.
You asked for 4 things: your phone, your wallet, your keys and your denture. I stopped asking questions.
You have no concept of how high I am, do you?
skyped with him for 45 min in the bath while i shaved my legs. new level in the relashionship
Masturbated while waiting for my face mask to dry, so it was a productive night.
i cant believe the cop was fine with you saying no we are in a hurry when he asked to search your car
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