No. one of us needs a degree and I am already the alcoholic friend. I can't do everything
Watching Argentina vs Germany during a wedding on an iPhone. Thank you Steve Jobs.
the awesomeness of being snowed in wore off after we ran out of beer and we realized we really didnt want to be stuck with everyone.
Found out that it IS actually possible to get road head from somebody in the back seat
Hate is such a strong word! I prefer to think that you strongly dislike me due to the honesty I show towards your routine shortcomings of success in life.
Made myself shower before I'd masturbate. I probably should have wined and dined myself too, but that's pushing it too far.
So, I'm stoned at his house petting the neighbors cat I made him steal.
You're a fucking train wreck.
I don't remember what you were saying to me in the bathroom. But whatever it was, yes, because i remember nodding a lot.
I wish I cared about making my vagina as presentable as you do.
Do you think I'm short enough to dress up in a ghost costume and go trick or treating and have people believe that I'm actually a child?
Its was awkward last year cuz in the middle of it her mom bust In the room with noise makers and champagne
I could not handle jail. And my very angry parents.
I got to walk around for eight hours wearing power armor and acting camp. No way I wouldn't love it.
I couldn't really understand you because you were really quiet and I said "I don't know what you're saying, it's kind of a big mumble" and you said "that sums up my life"
My ex just brought my grandpa weed. Not sure how I feel about this.
Randomize
