this is amy. the small petlike person from the womens bathroom at the reef.
so i realized that everyone figured out i was a slut before i did. then i realized that no one felt like telling me. sometimes i think you just keep me around for entertainment.
you're right.
he kept asking me if i had been in a pool or a lake recently, i didnt want to say i know where the swimmers ear came from. shower sex.
i just got yelled at for having sex. this sorority thing is worst than being at home. at least at home they think im still a virgin
Article 1, law 1, section 1 of the apartment 25 party handbook: tarp will be purchased prior to any and all future parties. Aforementioned tarp will be placed on floor. Any and all sick patrons must relocate to tarp preceding the event of expulsion of bodily fluids. Failure to do so will result in ejection of guilty patron and banishment of the accused from succeeding party. All patrons must read and sign a copy before entry is granted.
I heard an explosion in the backyard. You told me you were playing "will it burn".
No. I just want to cuddle and talk about our feeling. Of course this a booty call.
I'd like to be surprised that there's a picture of someone pouring champagne in my boobs on Instagram, but I can't.
Here is a brilliant idea passed on from men who have that same regret. WEAR A FUCKING CONDOM ALWAYS.
She said, I've heard about you, from girls you wouldn't even be interested in. What?
I saw a kitty kat get finger blasted on the couch by a Bulls player
I'm not sure how to explain it, but I feel like our penises have a connection. Like long lost brothers. We're not even gay.
Bring me that man meat
My ex just brought my grandpa weed. Not sure how I feel about this.
You fell while talking to a cop, then proceeded to acuse him of tripping you... he was arresting you for public intox.
Randomize
