I only want to know people that are dynamic intelligent and totally insane
I don't think you know how difficult it is to pee in poncho..
so the car was packed with everything from my dorm, plus my mom. during the 6 hour trip home she found my kama sutra. started flippin through it.....
oh shit that had to have been awkward
i thought so too. until she asked what the check marks were for
No see this is how It goes: guys will fuck virgin girls. But girls don't really want to fuck virgin guys. So you're good have no fear.
i forgot beer had calories. that would explain alot.
bad decision 37: pregaming the antique store
I definitely recall eating shredded cheese out of the bag while you were wearing that apron.
She whispered into my eat that she wanted me to fuck her while her parrot watched...
Even though he was watching you pee on his bedroom floor, you kept denying it and saying he was dreaming
I need to stop ravaging the freshman dorm like a virginity-snatching dragon.
Ok despite the fact that both you and I love dick we could have a great marriage
My fridge door just caught on fire somehow.
He's giving me the absolute bare minimum amount of attention. Like whatever motherfucker, I've had like six super likes on tinder today
i cant believe the cop was fine with you saying no we are in a hurry when he asked to search your car
you asked me how to turn on the ladder
Randomize
