My hair reeks of homosexuality.
her vagina probably looks like a grenade went off in a deli
I was just about to go down on her when she gave herself a "smell check" and said "no, not today".
she has her graduation year in her skype name, it's like a constant reminder that she's jail bait.
woke up this morning in the hall outside of my parents room with a sign taped to myself that said "im sorry"...
His new job just became new places to have sex at.
Would you even take no as an answer? I have a feeling you see it more as a challenge.
U can find me on my couch hungover eatin tuna evaluating my life
He was my shower sex Sherpa last night. And we both made it safely up the mountain.
Girl it's 3:30 get your life together and come enjoy a bowl, some coffee and a brownie with me
Woke up in a bathtub with both of my legs broken. How was your night?
Which is worse that I came in public or that no one noticed?
Well, if it's rabies, your lips will swell just prior to the frothing. Get a lot of good pics!
I keep worrying the police are going to come looking for us.
For which one? Starting a fire on my porch or having sex on my porch?
Whats a polite way to say 'if you havent put on a freshman 15 i would like to see you during break'?
Randomize