If it were my dying wish, would you come over 2nite 2 save me?:):):) wana come anyways?
i waited two years for her to sleep with me. it just didnt seem worth it.
she lost her virginity three hours after you dumped her.
are you serious?
Nob stitches i do do not bleed anymorr!
Just so you know.. I just graduated college with your name still written on my chest
If that doesn't scream bromance I dont know what does
i'm sorry for cheering you on when you were making out with him. i was just celebrating the fact he was decent looking for once
I just wanted to hook up with a white guy to prove that i could go back.
To my wonderful winter break booty calls: thank you for making this holiday season enjoyable. I look forward to seeing you boys again this summer.
Next time someone asks you what your spirit animal is do you really want to answer the iowa state fair butter cow?
When and where the fuck did we get a beach ball??
They've already turned me into the Dean of Students once because they felt 'unsafe' because I came home hammered and asked one of them to make me a grilled cheese sandwich. Like, I just ASKED!
I smell like bonfire and ex-boyfriends
I asked him to change the channel. There was no way I could do reverse cowgirl with golf on.
You ripped my pants off and gave me the choice use it or lose it what was I suppose to do.
I can't remember what I did last night, but judging from the state of my hair I had a pretty good time.
went to class still drunk this morning and my professor made the class give me a round of applause and said, "see people, THIS is inspirational... if she can make it to class in this condition there is no excuse not to show up!"
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