brb k???!! plz don't leave i want 2 tlk bout r rltnshp
he fingered me, smelled his fingers, then asked me what i ate today..
The old saying is "its not the size of the boat-- but the motion of the ocean" is obviously for those on the "Small side." I am of the belief that "You can't churn butter with a toothpick"
Is being a pregnant whore worse than an average one?
Any parent would be proud to have a daughter that's a blowjob fairy
You seriously looked at the house acorss the street and implied that you thought they had nice Easters.
Shame should no longer be a word in your vocabulary.
If you ever bitch out on 72oz margarita night again, this friendship is over
Am I the only one that feels like there are hundreds of tiny people having a rave and stomping and kicking around inside my head this morning?
He was having a "party in the princess castle." At what point do I blindfold him and take him to AA?
Guy hitting on me at bar is guy who's Craigslist ad we laughed at the other night. Not even kidding.
We split an eighth of shrooms and went ice fishing. It didn't get weird until I caught one and we both started crying.
Alls I wanted was a fun New Years but I end up fingering a geico sales representative on a futon and giving her a ride to work the next morning
holy shit I was not prepared for her to whip out that dildo
Not going to make it tonight. Some cougar at the bar just told me she has dibs on my dick.
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