Holy shit I just stopped short on route 18 because I thought my gps was saying I had to turn right in 11 feet. After almost hitting the guardrail I realized I had to turn in 11 miles.
Fuck I'm high.
I cant video chat with you tonight, my parents are home
r u implying that im some kind of v-chat prostitution whore?
suddenly SuperBad didn't seem so funny anymore...she did have her period on my leg.
I just fucked a rockette. This would have been amazing a week ago.
We need to start having rules for the weekends. Like no more downing 3 shots because we want to slut dance a little harder or because biggie just came on.
I think we should make Neil Patrick Harris a permanent part of our role playing.
That's ok. Our relationship has a solid foundation of booze and questionable behavior.
He confessed to putting dry erase marker dots on my vibrator to keep track of when I "electronically cheated" and then passed out.
I lost it last night. That was humiliating. Cincinnati is now covered in my puke.
I was just too high to be in rapids man. I just screamed for the entire time I was jostling about.
REALLY should have cleaned under my bed before I had my parents come help me pack...things my parents just found: several condoms and a bottle of lube. My mom when she found a condom: "ooo ribbed. Laura's a lucky girl"
I will not be held responsible for my vagina's poor judgment.
Just saw an all male dolphin threesome from underwater viewing
And what in gods fuck were you drinking. It tasted like windex with a mixture of juce
sorry i was ignoring you last night i accidentally did a bunch of pcp and thought i was inside tron
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