The pirates hijacked 3 more ships today!!
we need a boat to join in
Obama is on top of it we'd get killed within mins, but we'd live in legend foreva
you know when i was in school the girls definitely did not have the tits the 15 year olds have now. so unfair.
she took out her dip, threw up, and put it back in. it was like a scene from Nick and Nora's trip to the trailer park.
he sat in the bathtub shirtless yelling in gibberish for 40 minutes. funniest. stoner. ever.
We're playing Edward Bottle-of-eight-dollar-sale-wine-hands now
That's the last time we joust in Radio Flyer wagons after margarita night.
this is something i pride myself on being below average for
just woke up in the hotel with gummi bears all around me and someone took the tv
we took the tv and as for the gummi bears don't eat them you put em in her vagina
They asked if I wanted to shotgun a beer and before i could ask who had a knife they all had bit holes into the cans. Im never leaving Germany!
i caught the condom in my mouth.. dont ask me how
its friday night, im aone in my apartment and eating 2 year expired canned fruit, naked. i'm not single or anything..
Legitimate concern. Who am I going to have birthday sex with?
I still have your make up all over the inside of my thighs from the face sitting. Free tonight?
i wasnt sure i had a crush on her until i woke up this morning and saw i had googled fifteen variations of "lesbian marriage in estonia". where the fuck is estonia
I'm still amazed at how you managed to get Doritos in my damn front pocket without me noticing. I got crumbs everywhere.
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