she's telling me all about the love triangles of her sims. you tell me how it's going.
You told me I was special while we were having sex and I asked why.
What did I say?
Don't ask me questions while I have an erection,
I forget the details, but I'm told that I drunkenly stalked him around floor yelling obscure Jewish laws at him
The bouncer yelled at him for poking at the guy selling roses, I think it's time to leave.
i now officially have to be stoned in order to look like my passport when i go to a different country
Dude if you're not gonna answer them I'm gonna stop snapchatting you my hook ups
I feel like there should be a database and you screen your boyfriend's scrotum and all the fucked up shit they've done goes on file.
Regret, thy taste is box wine.
The guys are trying to figure out my orientation....think theyve settled on "drunksexual"
Yeah. I don't know. I'm just gonna show up at her place on valentines day with a jock strap, box of chocolates, and rose clenched between my ass cheeks with "be mine" written across my glorious man titties.
I've orgasmed four times in the past 24 hours. And my mom's dropping off cookies later
As long as he continues to be our subleaser and continues to fuck me, I think it's acceptable for me to steal a piece of bread here and there.
I fought a guy last night because he said "extra pulp orange juice is the best orange juice"
...I watched him run on the beach yesterday and I think I started ovulating
I'm not 100 percent on this, but I think I just shit a lump of cement. What the fuck happened last night?
Randomize
