im typing and i feel like my hands are on backwards.
Stop texting me, I'm right here.
i'm so desperate for a drink right now i looked up the recipe to make pruno
if every girl in minneapolis isn't pregnant when i get back to the cities i will cry
hows that letter of apology to the waitress at waffle house coming?
I mean, I'd wanted to go skinny dipping, hook up with him and have sex on a beach, so last night I basically killed 3 birds with one super slutty stone.
Jon thought he was that blonde chick from Three's Company when he was shrooming
sitting in the bathroom telling some girl to keep puking or she will die. while holding a beer. nursing school rocks.
Make puking fun. Chug half a monster right before you blow. Throw up foam. Most unique experience ever.
I know it I should, but it's kinda nice. It's smells like unbridled enthusiasm and copious amounts of melt your face off sex.
We got naked and peed in the garden. Something about bonding with our new house
I used my iced coffee to ice the bump on my head from last night
I need a light and a towel. ive got cum in places ive never had cum before.
i had a flashback to you roaring like a dying tiger and then throwing your wallet (maybe?) at the cat in the living room and saying "you're the only adult that lives here take all my money"
If by fun you mean, did I meet her cousin for the.first time and bang him, then yes it was a productive evening.
So I justmade it back home and was greeted to a squirrel in my dorm... Last time I let my friends rent it out for a party.
Randomize
