it was all downhill after the free blackjack taco
my dad just referred to me and my boobs as 'the three of you'
Good thing I was dressed to impress in my "I went nuclear on my wings" shirt even the girls are making out and I'm still 7th wheeling it...
Resolution for 2011: blow jobs are a privilege, not a right.
Yeaaah. I'm kinda wary about that guy. Does he still have that taser that he found on the train?
i'm sad. The beetle crawled away. I was only trying to get him stoned.
Cops came. Forced us to take the "Honk and We'll Drink" and the "Free Shots to Father's of Freshman Daughters" signs down. Before we did, someone honked and the cop said, "Aren't you gonna drink?" They then told us to move the party inside by ten.
I will cut you
Oddly enough thats the second time today someones said that to me
Put that in perspective
Just woke up from a weed coma and found a stem in my bra. Rainy day success.
Its official, if she bites your dick through your jeans, ya'll go together. A lesson you shouldn't have to learn after the fact.
He picked me up in the very car he devirginized me in, his moms toyota.
I mean your new thing is losing body parts and feeling colors so its not like we are hurting for entertainment
I'm honestly considering asking her if I can eat her out, as a friend.
You hit a new plane of existence as we all watched in awe
Baked out of my mind. Went in the bathroom, a daddy long leg spider and a carpenter ant are battling it out on the floor. I brought my computer with some dubstep.
OMG THE ANT WON
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