I woke up covered in BBQ sauce. My hand had "you win" written on it. Do I celebrate?
thats the mark of a good guy. when you can period all over his leg and he still thinks you're beautiful!
My 8 year old wants to name our new cat "fur burger". how do i explain that this is not really appropriate?
It's like my work doesn't even care about margarita mondays.
I'm picking out a half way decent top so if I get arrested I'll have a respectable mug shot photo. Always be prepared.
Well then I realized I had a bigger problem when I woke up a long board.
She's either too fat to type, hammered or has terrible spelling.
For gods sake, I only took one. With two nyquils. What a happy world its been today. Fulfill your obligations and then its marvelouso.
I think I'm just going to up-end a bottle of wine and look through pictures of what my life used to be.
I guess when I black out I feel that it's not inappropriate to grope my gf in front of her parents.... But hey at least I'm starting off 2013 single
Goddamn it Peter ur the only person i know who can make going down on a girl a competition.
She won. Twice.
i don't know how to react to you in a diaper crying and calling a football 'sadie'.
Omg. I meet up with you guys with bodily fluids on my chin ONE time and suddenly I'm a whore.
You need to get a passport so we can carry our bad decisions over the border
Pretty sure this radio station is run by a cult. Good thing it's in Spanish, can't brainwash someone who can't understand you.
Randomize