So I walked out of my room and there was my brother....standing naked
Welcome to my life. currently drinking beer through two straws. easier/faster that way.
She was narrarating everything she did.. like while making toast.
I walk in and my mom takes one look at me and just says, ".... Consequences"
I will never try to masturbate with americas funniest home videos playing in the background ever again
We found them in a dumpster making out trying to get their privacy
just 'accidentally' changed my relationship status to 'in an open relationship' just to see what offers I might get if I were to dump him. it's not looking good
I wish! That ended in 2001 when we all got collectively band from the Settle Inn. As a group we are also band from social events at the zoo. It's impressive really.
That little tingle vodka gives me in my esphagus is what lets me know I'm still alive.
Mostly because I hate my job and a have a photogenic penis.
So his roommate walked in on us, went upstairs to tell her bf she has found a new use for the rafters & they must try it.
I'm at a loss. By loss I mean singing songs from Wicked and pretending I'm at the Oscars
there's a 50/50 chance the night will end in alcohol-induced rituals of satanic nature
Hey every now and then can you tell me you want to fuck me to boost my confidence? Thanks.
I’m doing tequila shots with lesbians. This isn’t how I planned my night but I’m not complaining
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