Oh yes. The girl who wanted me to watch her pee.
3 different guys in my psych class know me as 3 different names and said hi to me with all 3 different names-Andrea, Grace, and Bella
I've never been more proud of you
my purse only fit my wallet or the martini shaker. it wasnt even a question of which i was bringing.
I've blown him so many times I feel like I have a better relationship with his dick than I do with him.
Woke up with a migrane, threw up blood, then my headache went away. I'm going to convince myself that it was just a bad batch of blood so I can drink again tonight
sorry for allegedly lighting the beer pong balls of fire
I was in the freezer we were knocking over shit. Speaking of which i asked my boss. I can hook up with girls in the freezer
Yeah just sayin. Whenever you want to come over and wank me off you can
Apparently unused tampons can also double as things to bite down on during public sex to prevent screaming...
I vaguely remember making out with his tattoo (?) and giving him an awesome massage and then I passed out on his floor. Shrug
Dude. Yeah. This is a game changer. I feel dirty and possibly pregnant and it hasn't happened yet.
Turning 21 will be slightly bittersweet. Never again will I be able to get underage drunk at Disney World, now I'll only be able to get legal drunk and that just sets a whole different and sad tone for my life.
Also I'm proud of us for having an educational conversation in this group text.
Just used my eyelash curler to open a bottle of cider...
Turns out both me and my grandpa have a guilty pleasure for South American men.
He wore a t-shirt that had an arrow pointing to his crotch and "DO IT FOR THE VINE" on it.
At least he's honest about how long he'll last.
Randomize
