Viking lives by an ancient code of honor that we do not understand.
What code could that possibly be? Bothering the fucking shit out of people while being physically repulsive?
Spent 200 bucks on a stripper for a good night hug. I give up.
Just took the worst coed shower ever. We both cried. AND I only shaved one leg.
This is stressing me out. I feel like I need to eat the dick.
They shoved things up my nose I feel violated
I want a MapMyFart App, where I can mark every spot where I have ripped one. Like here.
Did you seduce any young men into coming home to your love nest of poutine and jäger bombs?
We broke into her grandpa's pool at 2 am and I held my underwear out the window on the way home.
And noooow we're smoking a ton of REALLY strong weed and THIS IS THE SOFTEST CAT EVER
He smacked my ass so hard my ass cheek looks like Wilson from Cast Away
I literally can not watch Thor without thinking of your dick
I threw up in my brother's Easter basket
You made noises. And kept meowing. I have a twenty minute phone call to prove it.
Just found a note on the bed that said "Dear mittens, had to leave early I'll be back soon."
WTF? Are you mittens?
She said she didn't care that I was gay and wants to ride the fucking rainbow
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