Just tried to tap morse code on the wall seperating our beds to tell you I was awake and ready to smoke
I'm way to drunk for this play. I'm about to run up on stage and drop the main character
He acted like he was sleep fucking because I woke up to him screwing me in the middle of the night and he had is eyes closed and was mumbling things the whole time and wouldn't respond to me.
Is that even possible?
I called him by the wrong name to test him and he instantly stopped, rolled over and acted like he was still sleeping...I think he might break up with me tomorrow.
Is it possible to rally from a drunken seizure?
just found out I was hugging strangers at the bar last night. there's photographic evidence. I know none of them
I woke up this morning with a text from my mom as to why the hell random people were showing up at the house. Turns out nobody came to our house party because I gave them my old address, fuck pre-partying for real
I just trimmed my bush to manageable levels. I'm gonna take a nap and then get in there and finish the job.
He got naked after doing the Ice Water Challenge and it was still enormous. So, yeah, I stayed over.
If you saw or spoke to me yesterday can you message me. Trying to make a timeline of the day I was too drunk to remember
Fuck that guy and his dumb haircut and awesome dick
I think I've done enough damage with my vagina as of late, thank you
Dont you look at me in that tone of voice
In other news, I’ve officially fucked a grandpa.
Idk what's worse.... Yesterday not waking up in my bed or today waking up in the hello kitty gown.
She called me at 2am crying because her late night booty call moved out of state
Randomize
