So i think we're being coned into a threesome with the promise of pokemon
it's great music for shaving your balls
At victory brunch. Have a decent story. Im now eskimo brother with the duke mens basketball teams from 2002 to 2008 and obamas right hand man
I woke up to her staring at me in a corner moaning over and over again about how good the pie crust tasted
DUDE, DID YOU KNOW YOU CAN JUST RENT AN ELEPHANT???
Oh God.
wine lets you be on time to class apparently
This is a dangerous realization
I wish my brain had a "congrats you just defeated the munchies" notification!
I consented to having my finger branded. How was your night?
Dude. Yeah. This is a game changer. I feel dirty and possibly pregnant and it hasn't happened yet.
The point remains that this is the setup for some great stories
Or terrible, horrifying, traumatic experiences
great clearly means different things to us
I think the best part was the fact that the stripper's lock screen was a picture of the virgin mary
I'd say I was is in rare form last night but it's becoming pretty common.
He's really cute...He stopped talking to me because i pulled my skirt up and peed in a demi plie position...
I just saw a guy in a zippo shirt buy 2 gallons of fire starter fluid and then proceed to smoke a cigarette. I feel like hes got some big plans for his tuesday.
Dont care about too tired for sex, thank you for leaving your laser pointer. I have now determined both my cats are stupid.
Randomize
