My hand turned me down
It's all fun and games until the last slice of pizza gets bong water spilled on it.
Oh and fyi, I've been drinking and about to do free weights. I'll late you know how this goes.
If only guys knew how much awkward ass shaving goes into making sex this good...
Not quite sure what happened last night. I'll drive your dresser over to you later.....
He is now the second fuck buddy that i have met by walking up and grinding on him. My ass is so much more productive than dating
You need Xanax blowdarts
I think we did. All i know my pants smell like pong water due to the bathroom extravagansa. God I feel like a whore.
Please warn me if you ever end up in porn, cause I don't want to stumble across that on accident, okay?
It was one of those "how did I get to my bed and what am I wearing" mornings.
He's interpretive dancing to Crazy by Britney Spears and expressing his feelings for either me or the guy next to us
why do guys have to express their feelings when they know your seeing someone else ? I fucked him anyways to make him feel better , and to know what he's missing.
Fantasizing about the apocalypse is fun and shit until the conditions that could lead to one suddenly seem feasible
What color nail polish screams, "Either fuck me or get the hell out of my way"?
Now that I'm sober I feel the need to tell you that I'm not really a fish whisperer....
Randomize
