the bus pole looks like a man who feels guiltyty about something
I'm at breakfast still drunk holding a blow up parrot
i want to fuck
?
it's pretty self explanatory
I'm lit.While shaving my legs I pretended the razor was a tractor cutting down corn. Noises included.
Should we discuss the rug burns on my back or just save that for a separate conversation
Maybe. This hangover is made of nightmares and that thing from the Alien movies.
Nothing says "I mean business" like using a cart at the liquor store.
I don't remember what you were saying to me in the bathroom. But whatever it was, yes, because i remember nodding a lot.
And think got sick again from going outside naked. Word to all females...don't try the naked trench coat thing.
I like to play this game where I try to reach orgasm before my bathtub overflows....lost tonight.
.It's like gods test of willpower against vaginal comfort
VAL. THIS MOTHERFUCKER IS LAYING IN MY BED WEARING A CAT SHIRT, VAL. COME SAVE ME, VAL.
I just found your shirt hanging in a tree 4 blocks from the party...in the opposite direction of your house. where are you going?
ok morning sex is a totally valid reason to come in late... ur good, cya in 20
wow wtf man i was the friend bailing you out of jail with 500 cash and you didnt have the common courtesy of waking me up for class when i passed out drunk and naked in the bath tub
Randomize
