pshh wine cellars. now if he has a tequila cellar whole different story
i woke up with someone drivers licenses in my wallet this am...he said i don't have a business card so just take my drivers license
Dont ask, hes out back rolling around in the yard freaking out. literally just had a 15 minute conversation, only word i could make out was "yellow"
speaking of graduation plans, i'm blacked out eating sausage
I say go for the trifecta and maybe you'll get a medal or something. Or a baby. That's like the same thing right?
He came over hammered at four in the morning with roses trying to get me back when my new fling opened the door he just stood there crying for 40mins even after we closed the door
Apparently she has a 10 week old kid, which would explain the hallway effect I was feeling.
Your biggest crisis right now is that you can't decide whether to keep hooking up with AN NFL PLAYER or try to rekindle your relationship with your ex. You are a walking white girl problem.
A gay dude just spanked me with a nicholas sparks novel and called me foxy. I'm putting this on my resume.
I'd risk everything I own for 10 min naked with her, 2 would be sex and the rest me crying like a little girl.
The fact that we all screamed by Felicia to a bitch actually named Felicia will be a highlight of my life
I'm scrolling through our convo thread and all we talk about is pizza, alcohol & dick with the occasional "I miss you" thrown in.
Your babysitter texted, wants me to pay with weed. I don't know where to get any & don't want to. Will she take cigarettes instead? Or um, cash? Like a person?
I've slapped too many boys and done too many naked laps for it only to be 10:30pm
You owe me a one night stand and a line. Possible an inflatable flamingo as well. And a caesar salad.
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