He was actually able to throw up in the bucket from the top bunk. im impressed.
Somehow last night, my dad got me so drunk that I ended up throwing up on the couch, turning the cushions over to hide it, and going to sleep on them.
I would like to apologize for making you the target of my "I wish head hair grew as fast as Pubes speech" the other night
I just want uncharted vagina. Fresh and ripe.
Yeah. I've decided no relationship can survive me shoving my boobs in the guys face
Oh my fucking god I saw the pictures. What the mother fucking fuck. Destroy the pictures. Destroy the fucking pictures.
Please confirm the destruction of the pictures. NOW.
Yeah, first time I've shit my pants in my twenties... I'm thinking about putting it on my Facebook timeline
Was in the middle of a keg stand, the frat guys dropped me, and I broke my nose. My mom didn't enjoy that call from the hospital.
Beans, may the odds of a nip slip and drunken make out session be ever in your favor
Have you ever had chicken nuggets while high? Because it tastes like hearing the Beatles for the first time
Drove by a guy getting road head, midday on O Street. That could be us, but you won't let me in your pants when you drive.
I assume you passed out however I'm drinking jäger and beer in bed with my cat so your friendship world have been appreciated
you were walking down the sidewalk and just puked. didnt even stop or slow down and just kept going. i was so impressed i didnt even tell anyone you threw up on passing peoples shoes.
I'm giving drunk me full control of my body for the next few days. Please don't let me die.
Made out with sailor moon tonight. Childhood dreams do come true.
Randomize