Let's hustle tonight so we can relax tomorrow
Perfect. Like where your heads at
By relax I mean have sex
bahahaha. this guy working at subway literally has someone's name tattooed on his arm, crossed out, and another name below it.
i'm not sure what happened. i know i woke up on the floor of his bathroom, then had morning sex with him. dont remember getting to his apt. dont remember much.
morning sex?... maybe not a total mistake then? he seems like a normal person, so rare at BU
oh no, he's far from normal. i know his high school girlfriend. she's CRAZY. and he definitely deals prescription drugs. also. he had sex with me even though i slept on his bathroom floor.
This is why you don't make out with cougars at a bar... I got a linkedin request from her, wtf?
Omg. In the pub, there's a guy shouting at the olympic channel 'yeah! Kill that motherfucker!' we're watching figure skating.
Booyah. Found 8000 pesos in my closet and that's apparently 608 US dollars
I'm the only kid serving jury duty. And I'm the only one who may walk out of here in handcuffs for a warrant. I'm enabling these people to doubt America's youth once again.
all i wanted to do was something grown up. like go to applebees and drink.
He titled his birthday party on facebook, "BJ's in PJ's- an adult slumber party." I'm the only one invited.
Is this like a "I'm taking you out to dinner and treating you with respect" kind of date, or is this a "I'm gonna fill you with alcohol and cheese and stuff my dick in your anus" kind of date?
i asked the cop if we could stop and do a chinese firedrill.... he said no.
So Monday we're lesbians.
Deal. This decision is final and any rebates on this will result in losing an eyeball.
I try not to flex my sex appeal too much around the engineers, it's like feeding bears...always ends in disaster.
Thanks again for the coffee and orgasms
Apparently we fucked, I kicked him out, then he came back and we did it on the coffee table and in the kitchen.
Randomize
