we did anal to Party In The USA and he busted to Firefies .. felt like we were fucking in a middle school dance
I want a meaningful relationship and i wont get one if i keep giving him blow jobs in my basement while watching family guy.
Awkward interaction of the day: Staring at some guy trying out if he is or is not the guy that woke me up yesterday by getting arrested in front of my apartment.
How the fuck did you end up in a tree? With multiple people?
I have fireworks and redbull; let's make heart attack inducing magic happen.
her vagina just converted me to Judaism.
I feel bad for his balls. Ive never seen so much sperm. He had to be dying
Blow job season was short but glorious.
All of my exes are either overweight and neckbearded or dead. Someone out there is looking out for me.
THERES A FUCKBOY IN MY PERSONAL SPACE
GET IT AWAY FROM ME IM ALLERGIC
And the next thing I knew I was blowing this random hot italian bartender with an uncircumcised penis in his work closet
you were so high you asked for half double stack and half crispy chicken sandwich "welded together" in the wendy's drive through
Parade of Dicks...that's what I'm calling 2017
My friends said as soon as you walked in, I motor boated you like there was no tomorrow.
Yeah, I liked it.
I can appreciate that you picked up the hot drummer, but don’t have sex in front of my house lmao
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