ally, we are sitting by a fire and you are totally hot. no pun intended
I'm currently imdbing Helena Bonham Carter to see if there are any pictures of her that don't scare the crap out of me.
Good luck with that.
you tried to scramble eggs in my dryer last night. i want you here in 15 minutes to clean this shit up
you would think someone who fights for his country could fight to last longer than 2 minutes
Apparently faking a threesome isn't as much fun as you'd think
On my arm I have 12 dashes, and below is written "plus 2 pretty stout whiskey drinks, so, you be the judge"
found her sleeping in the closet. woke her up and she said she was camping.
So as I left the Australian's hotel room, I said "Welcome to America. You're going to do just fine here."
I should work for the FBI. Or planned parenthood.
That's quite a broad spectrum. What did you do?
If we accept the love we think we deserve do we also accept the sex we think we deserve?
Is it wrong that I want to do a nude photo shoot with nothing but a light saber?
Well I woke up naked, with a santa hat on, and a bag of beef jerky next to me. So yeah, I would say it was a pretty successful trolley
He wants me to tell you "my boner misses you"
Chick in the kitchen making breakfast.. Yours or mine?
They say you need two forms of ID, but in reality 1 nice set of tits works every time
Randomize
