Texts From Last Night · Random Texts

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(917): View more from New York City

i have a feeling tonight will end in rehab

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(989): View more from Michigan

I spent my night drunkenly staring at a picture of John Stamos. How do you think I feel?

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(276): View more from Virginia

I have fruit by the foot roll-ups. I wonder if a man could tie them together and make an editable bra....

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(805): View more from California

I wonder if a fish could survive in vodka

(714): View more from California

I could

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(412): View more from Pennsylvania

Hows cali? I thought of you as I shaved 1/4 of my legs last night.

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(208): View more from Idaho

I told him if he cums in my mouth he has to buy me a cake that says "sorry I came in your mouth"

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(513): View more from Ohio

I found out his moms name, maiden name, profession, and office location, his dads name and profession, his home phone, picture of their house, all of his work profiles, and the cost of their house. All I'm trying to do is find his damn twitter

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(571): View more from Virginia

we got cupcakes after we fucked. gives a whole new meaning to sugar daddy

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(662): View more from Mississippi

the awesomest thing about staying behind in our lame ass dorm room by myself during spring break: I've now nutted in 3 inconspicuous locations on your side of the room. brag to me again about how fucking awesome tahoe is you shithead. I dare you.

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